Secret Shows

Members Only – November 15, 2024

Patrick bet everything he had on the big fight an it’s weighing on his conscience. Can we talk about something funny for once? Will you please stop bringing everyone down about it? This is the worst.

Make It Stop! (The Drunk Bait Stream – GOT ‘EM!)

Patrick pretends to be drunk for almost two hours to show how desperate the people who hate Nick are to believe their own narratives. Please don’t comment about how bad this is. Everyone knows. It’s on purpose.

MEMZ CLUB! Are you a MEMZ?

Times are tough all over! Grab your favorite bottle of scotch and saddle up to the NLO saloon for some high times and high tea! We’re diving into the wild wacky world of recklessness! Who’s in? Call your dad because it’s gonna be a late one! What does that mean?

FRIDAY NIGHT! Come Hang & Fight Me!

Patrick does a Members Only show discussing some of our favorites, including Simply Sara and Royce Miller eating some ungodly items, as well as a check in with Aaron Imholte of the Steel Toe Morning Show.

RUN, PIGGY, RUN! A Chad Zumock Experience

Chad Zumock stole sandwiches from Whole Foods. Chad Zumock stole credit cards from Veterans. Chad Zumock broke in to his ex-girlfriend’s house in the middle of the night. Chad Zumock fell asleep and drove in to a tree at 3am. Chad Zumock faked getting jumped for YouTube clicks. Chad Zumock bought Twitter followers. Chad Zumock told a depressed coworker to end herself. Chad Zumock is afraid of people making fun of his videos. Chad Zumock sticks up for himself with fake social media accounts. Chad Zumock is banned from comedy clubs for being a nuisance.

FRIDAY NIGHT F&CKSTREAM! PUT IT IN ME!

Come on baby, light my fire. Come on daddy, fill my tire. Come on Jerry you’re a liar. Most birds are classified as flyers. Let’s go hang in the shire. Things are looking pretty dire.

FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE!

Get stroked about it, querms! Patrick is back after a week of insane breakdowns and lots of build up, but the dentist could be handling that for him this weekend, if you know what I mean! I don’t know why I said that. It’s not coded. I have a dentist appointment. I also just switched to first person. It’s just me. I’m so alone. Come drink with me on this Friday of L’s I’ve been stacking up lately!

MEMBERS ONLY LATE NIGHT HANG!

Come join Patrick and a cast of imaginary friends as they set sail for whimsy aboard the USS Rainbow. Will they ever find the magic starfish medallion? Can they rescue the mermaid from the pirates before her time runs out? Ask the gamekeepers, man! We are here to chill about it!

MEMBERS ONLY: DonkeyLips LIVE! Mersh Is Messing Up More! Aaron Imholte Is OUT OF IDEAS!

Michael Ray Bower aka Donkeylips is in Pennsylvania and doing a media tour for a nostalgic Nickelodeon convention he is signing pictures at this weekend. It’s a different Bower than we’ve recently seen at home depressed. Mersh is a character and we can’t stop watching him dream of success while wasting all his money gambling on women’s tennis.Aaron Imholte has given up and knows it won’t be long before he’s selling cars or hot dogs downtown. You won’t believe the laziness!

“Comedian” Godfrey Is a MORON! No Ideas & PILLED OUT?! You Be The Judge! How Much Does He STINK?

It’s Friday and Patrick is finally getting used to being back in the states, what with your burger sandwiches and your Texas-style barbecue and southern fried chitlins. Hit the like button! There’s gonna be a lot of music and attitude, so leave the complaints about it in your brain, grandcha. We explore Godfrey, Chad’s bestest friend and one of the greatest comedians on the planet. Turns out Godfrey is slow af, or really has a substance abuse problem. Which do you think it is? Watch one of the worst podcasts we have ever seen from anyone ever. This guy has no personality and no ideas, and is so delusional he thinks he could play the next Spiderman and blames racism on his lack of success when it’s clear he just stinks. Join Patrick for a fun free fall through fanaticism. Who know’s what we will get up to!

MEMBERS ONLY! Kevin Brennan Can’t Snipe! Bower Carb Loads! Steel Toe Sad Show! CRAZY JOE Is Back!

Patrick is here to get your goose! On this silly Friday show, Patrick finds out Kevin Brennan, an old man who used to wander on to the set at Saturday Night Live while they were filming, is sniping his program. Saturday Night Live was a show that was funny in the 1980’s and 1990’s. Anyway, because Kevin is slow and sunsetting, he thinks Patrick is very late when in reality Patrick plays music for a long time before the show every Friday night. Patrick makes the old man question his tech prowess witha a great cold open GOT EM! Steel Toe is more pathetic than ever. Michael Ray Bower wastes a bunch of money on vegetables. Crazy Joe is stating to lose it again and the onions arent’ helping.

DEBATE NIGHT! Who Will Win? Come Scream at Your Screen!

Patrick is diving headfirst into the Trump vs. Biden debate. Strap in for a very serious breakdown of Trump’s word salads and Biden’s nostalgic detours. We’ll navigate the political circus with sarcasm and skepticism, dissecting dodged questions and accidental wisdom. Grab your popcorn, jerbs!