Featured Videos

FREE BONUS: Thai Rivera RUNS AWAY To Austin!

December 19, 2022

Grrrl can you believe it? Our favorite little Asian girl, Thai Rivera, has run off to Austin, Texas, exactly as predicted by Patrick over one year ago. She is nothing if not super basic! We watch Thai explain in his normal exhausting way the basics of moving as only he can. Poor Bijou! Patrick has new predictions that you're going to want to bet on down at your local sportsatorium. Will Thai find the friendships, respect and popularity he is looking for in Austin? Or will he be spit out the bottom of the open mic scene just as he has in Phoenix twice, Los Angeles, and Las Vegas? Will he be banned from the clubs there like he is here? Will his "friends" like Tim Dillon and Tony Hinchcliffe put up with his ignorant gay sass in their town?


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Featured Videos

BONUS: Getting Weird and Looping

December 17, 2022

Patrick has a looper and it's Friday night, so why not get together and see what happens about it? Thanks so much for making NLO a part of your being! Some guy tries to get Patrick into a crypto scam called VECHAIN! Patrick has some vodka for a change. A troll throws money at the show and claims victory! We talk about the Established Titles scam with a real scotsman. We get in to how insane Kanye West is, and someone in the chat brings up a video that Kanye was in about Joe Rogan and mechanical bees. I'm not sure what's edited and what's real, but one thing is for sure - Kanye is bananas on a level we can't begin to comprehend.


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NLO Shows

NLO 1445: Bitchin’ About Butch

December 16, 2022

Patrick is sauced up and dives in to the always-entertaining world of comedian Butch Bradley, detailing his bad behavior over the years, including his attempt to slander, libel, and fail to pay Patrick for services rendered. Who is this INSANE and UNHINGED comic, where did he come from before the Las Vegas scene, and why is here here? Patrick talks about his LA Comedy Club residency, his questionable treatment of friends and loved ones, and the facade and uncomfortable vibes that make up the world of Butch Bradley – the FUNNIEST comedian in Las Vegas! Don’t you agree? 😂 …

NLO Shows

NLO 1444: Kill Carlson (aka Jill Tony)

December 16, 2022

Everyone is living in their own insane little bubble and Nobody Likes Onions is here to cover it all! On this show, Patrick roasts comedian Trixx for his woke virtue-signalling, Big Irish Jay for his towel usage, and Lindsay Glazer for a WHOLE LOT of reasons we can’t even begin to describe. We breakdown the Jill Carlson appearance on Kill Tony at Skankfest Las Vegas in a fair and measured manner. Rokfin needs someone to guide them to success. Patrick talks about a lot of people cryptically to avoid virtual eye contact. Men in our society are acting bonkerz. Cool Cat has a new project and is looking for people to join in. Did we mention Lindsay Glazer may be a loon? …

Featured Videos

Melton in the Morning (Nov. 3, 2022)

December 6, 2022

The midterms are next week and the state of this country is truly depressing. Our choices are limited and our fundamentals are flawed. Patrick spend the majority of the show discussing the broken system and rampant denial of reality that seems to be affecting everyone in America in modern times. Kanye West fans have decided to raise money on crowdfunding platform GoFundMe for the rapper to return him to billionaire status. The fundraiser has been removed but that hasn't stop the narcissism greed train from continuing on the platform. Affirmative action may be the one thing we all fundamentally agree about but will never vote together on. Hot cookies don't come easy.


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Featured Videos

Melton in the Morning (Nov. 1, 2022

December 6, 2022

Patrick does a quick introduction for Rokfin people, and explains that this show will be improving slowly. A transgender woman buys the Miss Universe pageant. Costco is selling a 60,000 piece puzzle. Hollywood is being overrun by the homeless and no one seems to care. The grossest man ever is dead, possibly from trying to be clean. People are snapping at parties and shooting people. Why can't people just have wild conspiracies and believe nonsense anymore? The Paul Pelosi thing has some weird details and there's something amiss. Kanye West is pouring money in to something called the Ecosystem. Kindness is overrated.


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NLO Shows

NLO 1443: 43

December 1, 2022

It’s Patrick’s birthday! Patrick went to Barry’s Downtown Prime steakhouse for a delicious birthday dinner, and he is unhappy to report that they still didn’t nail the temperature on his steak. Patrick has a bombshell from Agent O. Allegedly Leslie Jones assaulted and cost a bartender his job after a recent interaction. Josh Denny claims to have talked to Kanye West for hours, and is possibly going to be working on his new clothing line! Is it a lie? Chappelle is hosting SNL and the writers are threatening to boycott. The Oscars are trying to become relevant again by bringing back Jimmy Kimmel, as if anyone is interested. …

NLO Shows

NLO 1442: SWAT Dream

November 16, 2022

There’s a good chance we aren’t going to make it. All aboard the crazy train! Patrick Is hopped up on Indian food and promoting the new stuff over in the NLO Store. Patrick is excited about his upcoming birthday so please buy him something immediately or send dollars. Patrick wants to really start using the PO Box so send in your weird stuff immediately! We go over a brief history of SWATing and how it works. Is Less Than Jake dead yet because Patrick has memories about it. Apologies for the crappy sign, but it could be a lot worse. Captain Paprika himself, David Hollywood Hulett cuts his live stream when they discover NLO watching! Thai goes to Ocha to “hang out” now. Patrick makes a mistake about GrandTheftGinger Ryan Bourassa.. …

Aftershow Video

Aftershow 1441: Halloween Spectacular!

November 16, 2022

Patrick is back with a FREE apology show to make up for the cancellation of last night's aftershow! It's the anniversary of Butch Bradley stealing $1200 from Patrick! We get in to some hot BBQ talk and give a warning for anyone who wants to brine a turkey this Thanksgiving.If you think you know everything there is to know about rubs and coarse ground pepper, you have another thing coming! We present a very scary HALLOWEEN edition of The Tweets I Seen, featuring Casper The Comic in heels and lipstick. Angie Krum cannot stop herself from grabbing low-hanging comedy fruit, and she wants you to be hacky on the radio like her! Our old friend Nick Starr is back posting mental breakdowns and publicly airing out his relationship drama on social media again.


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NLO Shows

NLO 1441: Musk Mandates

November 16, 2022

Patrick is in a mood and he’s here to take it out on your ear holes! We’re relaunching PM in the AM over on Rokfin and Patrick has some plugging to do about it. Patrick thought there was a ghost in the studio and yelled at the curtain for no reason. The midterm election is right around the corner, and Patrick has some opinions on how stupid all of it is. Paul Pelosi has been hammered in the head, which is crazy! The chat gets very uncomfortable as Patrick tries to shake people away from being radicalized robots. Reboot your brains and start thinking again for the sake of society. Patrick talks about why starting your own whatever never works anymore. Practical home alarm system advice is hard to come by, but we’ve got it here …

Featured Videos

BONUS – Skankfest Recap

November 10, 2022

Patrick checks in after a short hiatus without shows. Some medical issues have been plaguing Patrick's ability to move about this earth without being in pain. Patrick recaps attending Skankfest Las Vegas and watching Thai Rivera walk half the room in five minutes. The movie Bros is awful and Billy Eichner is having a tough time with it. Patrick tries to wrap his head around dads and their love for Over the Top Chili. Casper ThaComic refuses to put up the recording he covertly made of Patrick at a recent open mic. Patrick tries to explain what he's going through but he gets a little choked up and just has to leave. Or maybe it's a bit. It's hard to tell anymore.


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NLO Shows

NLO 1440: Is Comedy Broken?

November 9, 2022

Patrick is in a mood as the show kicks off and he has frustrating issues with his Mac and iPad. Patrick talks about the return of PM in the AM which will exclusively be available on RokFin and the Overdose. There’s never been more options for content creators to lose money on! Comedy is changing, and comedy in Las Vegas is a weird creature on its own. Patrick rants about comedians who constantly headline bar shows over and over and over and continue to advertise them like it’s special every week. Patrick rubs weed dust in his eyes and has to scream for seven minutes about it. The Paprika Show is one of the most revealing and sad productions on the Las Vegas comedy scene. We listen to an ex-UFC fighter and a hairdresser talk about nothing. …