chad zumock Archives • NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

CHAD ZUMOCK: Drunk Comedy LOLCOW Can’t Stop Drinking & Sucking!

December 16, 2023

Ding dong! It’s Saturday night and the mood is right! Come on down to watch the latest edition of Chad Zumock, alcoholic fail whale, completely embarrass himself for about thirty dollars. The worst part is the helpless little pig can’t keep himself sober enough to do his own gig! Drink up, piggy! Atlantic City is in two months and reality awaits you at the Borgata! Come find out how many fans are on your side, oink boy! The difference between this fantasy world where Chad has fans and the stark reality of Chad trying to act popular in person is going to be a sight to behold. …

December 15, 2023 PART 2: Let’s Get It Poppin Fresh! The After-MLC Breakdown!

December 15, 2023

Many hours have passed and the landscape has changed. Chad Zumock and Kate Meaney have been emboldened by the recent backlash of Kevin Brennan on Patrick. After gushing for weeks and calling him the sheriff of the dabbleverse, the worm has turned and Patrick is seemingly on the outs with the pink hot dog man. But Kevin doesn’t need Patrick. He has Ray, and Kate Meaney, and let’s not forget his number one son, Chad Zumock. Kevin says Patrick shouldn’t come to Atlantic City, but how could the Big Onion miss this party? It’s on in Atlantic City baby! Let’s wrap up the week and try to smooth things over on this second installment of the Friday Onion program. Kick back and relax with Melton and the kids! There’s no reason to be upset. This has all been a big misunderstanding! …

BROWN-EYE BONUS! The Kate Meaney Chronicles! A Dumb Woman WASTES Her Family Legacy!

December 12, 2023

Toot toot! All aboard the Poo Poo Choo Choo! Kate Meaney is already spiraling OGAIN after trying to control her own image on Twitter and MLC all day. This chick is a wreck, and the more she talks, the funnier it gets. I’ve got good news and bad news for Kate Meaney, daughter of comedian Kevin Meaney; today you finally provided some hilarious content, but it once again revolved around what a delicious snack that bootyhole was for your ex-boyfriend – the one you said had a tiny peen. Anyway, girl. Let’s talk about it! …

December 4, 2023: The THACKERING Begins! Planet Goes DIRTY! Donkeylips Has BIG DREAMS!

December 4, 2023

It’s Monday, and it’s the start of a new month, and we couldn’t be happier that you’ve decided to join us here at The Onions. Patrick went to see Adam Sandler over the weekend and aside from having to watch his daughter sing a Taylor Swift cover song for nine minutes while the Sandman wept and played guitar, it was ok. We found out one of our favorite fatties has a dirty clips site and you can download a lot of gore that is sure to turn the bits and bytes on your hard drive rotten in no time. Opie Radio really is a delusional guy. Michael Ray Bower killed a cat in his dream and he thinks it’s something he needs to memorialize from a toilet vlog. Steel Toe is so far ahead of making their goals that you’re going to be sorry. Our favorite dumb financial advisor is back with a new podcast where she interviews other dumb girls about their financial mistakes and we learn nothing. …

November 30, 2023: Chad Zumock DOUBLES DOWN On DUMB!

November 30, 2023

Chad Zumock is desperate for attention. He’s an unloved alcoholic with no income, no prospects for a career, and no friends or relationships to lean on as a support system. After being arrested over and over for victimizing veterans and the elderly, stealing identities and credit cards, stealing from stores, driving drunk in to trees, losing jobs at radio stations, and lying about career credits and highlights, what’s a loser from Cleveland in subsidized housing to do? Chad’s latest Thanksgiving grift is afoot! Watch as we dive in to Chad’s lies and Chad’s cope on the latest EMERGENCY EDITION of Nobody Likes Onions. Who is dumber? Chad Zumock or the person he thinks you are? The startling criminal history and the journey of cascading mistakes by a dummy at the end of his rope are in this crucial episode! …

November 28, 2023: Happy Holidays? MAYBE NOT! Back to BASIC!

November 28, 2023

It’s Tuesday morning, and the plebs are frothing in the aisles for a new NLO. What will Patrick be mad about this morning? Will there be a classic rant against one of the fans for some minuscule reason? You can almost guarantee! We check in with some of our favorite nuts to see how they’re gearing up for the holidays. Is the loneliness enough to break some of our favorites, or will the holiday spirit prevail and allow happiness to shine forth? There’s no telling, but we are definitely here to watch it all. Mchael Ray Bower is at his lowest and his blurriest on the latest stream about his health and future plans. Steel Toe is terrified of medical news and has a cool new blackface story to tell you. Chad still has no idea what he is doing and his snipe streams are becoming less and less impressive. If you’re looking for a killer banana pudding recipe and need something to do with your gross boiled eggs. we have a woman with a few tricks up her sleeveless shirt. …

November 27, 2023: CRANKSGIVING! Kevin Brennan Is a GRUMP, Chad Zumock Lies, SORRY!

November 27, 2023

Just a reminder than nobody owes you anything and Patrick isn’t your real dad. You should probably find a new life with a new family. Patrick is doing a quick show to give his thoughts on the past week and the events of the day, and we are going to try to resume our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow. Why is Chad pretending to be in some sort of peril? Kevin Brennan is very concerned with everyone else and their productivity schedules. Ray Devito is getting weirder and weirder by the moment. Tookie is in trouble or something. I hope you had a nice time with your friends and family. Let’s get back to the nuts! …

November 17, 2023 – Steel Toe OWNS Chandler! Chad CRUMBLES Live! Josh Denny is LARGE Now!

November 17, 2023

Patrick isn’t the only one making a splash in the world of Big Beautiful Podcasters. Josh Denny, currently on his nineteenth attempt at a show someone will care about and/or watch, has ballooned to proportions that must be examined. Watch as over a decade of podcast experience culminates in more meh than you can imagine. Chad Zumock is in hiding after running away from his own show Thursday afternoon when Patrick surprised him with a snipe session. We catch up with some of our favorite nutty ladies, including Planet with a Palate and her rotund gal pals. They’re making dip or pasta or eggs or pickle juice. It’s hard to tell, really. But they are very, very fat and very, very chill about it all. This has gotta be good! …

SNIPING THE SNIPER! VOL. 1 – Can’t Wait To See His Face!

November 16, 2023

Chad Zumock is the Mudshark, aka The Sniper, and he’s the roughest streamer there is! Unless you try to do it back to him. Then you’re going to get a different guy. Ready to see what a complete bitch this Cleveland clown is? Watch his run, hide and quit his own show AGAIN after finding out he’s getting a taste of his own delicious sniper soup. Why can’t Chad hang? Why can’t Chad do a show? Why can’t Chad take what he claims to be the best at dishing out? Who cares? Watch with us and have a good time showing the world what a complete BOOB and total fake tough guy that comedian Chad Zumock is. Enjoy! …

November 14, 2023 – Chad’s STALE Standup! Are APRIL IMHOLTE’S Bags Packed? Get K-Mart Ready!

November 14, 2023

Patrick has some theories and what a better place to air them out than the daily Nobody Likes Onions podcast live stream comedy program! April Imholte’s anxiety is through the roof, and winter is coming! Will this woods woman be able to weather the depression of another Minnesota locked up with her scrawny stick husband playing radio in the basement? Is she bailing on more and more shows lately because of her fragile ego? Plus – we go over Chad’s standup comedy set from this past weekend in Ohio, and find out he still hasn’t written one new joke. The cope from Chad about losing a roast battle to Ray DeVito continues. It’s Training Tuesday, and we’ve got the tools you need to be K-Mart ready! …

November 13, 2023 – Ray Is MORE LOST Than Ever! Keith & The Girl’s NEW GRIFT!

November 13, 2023

Patrick is recovering from his weekend of birthday nonsense, and maybe now we can get back to normal about it. We may all have a case of the Mondays, but maybe with a little luck we can get through it. Ray DeVito has taken to YouTube to try to clear up any confusion about his roast jokes, but of course it comes across as confusing and defensive as usual. Watch as Ray defends nonsensical jokes that no one has any questions about, and gloss over others that were most definitely lifted. Keith and the Girl, the podcast no one can believe is still going, is back making a cash grab one last time. Their show has a big announcement to make, and it can’t mean anything good. Chemda is leaving, but somehow the show needs to keep going, and only your dollars can make it happen! …

November 9, 2023 – Steel Toe Is BROKE! Ray VS. Chad BREAKDOWN! Stats, Facts, Exclusives!

November 9, 2023

The roast between Cleveland goons Ray DeVito and Chad Zumock has people talking, and opinions differ with varying levels of passion. One thing is for sure – we were all very entertained. Almost two days out, Patrick has new thoughts and a complete breakdown of every joke on the roast, with stats and figures you’re going to love! Patrick has conducted conversations and interviews with many subjects involved in the roast, and some new facts are in that need clarification. And just when we thought we knew what was happening, we get another tip about this roast and the secrets it holds. …

DEVITO vs. ZUMOCK: Two Cleveland Nobodies Battle For Irrelevance

November 7, 2023

It's time for one of the most idiotic battles in comedy! Who is funnier? Will it be career felon, failed radio disc jockey and all-around woman repellant Chad Zumock, or the sunsetting simpleton with troubled toes, Ray DeVito? You don't care? Join the club! Chad set this up as an excuse to keep appearing on MLC and vanquish his most obvious competition for daddy Kevin's love, while also padding out his calendar between one nighters all over the Florida swampland. One thing is for sure - this will be an unorganized competition of tools, with no clear winners other than the MLC podcast and it's listeners who will ultimately revel in the sad display of machismo by two inept men who don't realize the fight left them a long time ago.

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November 7, 2023 – The Roast NOBODY Asked For! Chad Is Pathetic! Ray Is Sad!

November 7, 2023

It’s the day of the most pathetic excuse for a roast in recent comedy history. Gone are the days of respecting the craft and picking up a pen. Let the chips fall where they may when Chad Zumock and Ray DeVito awkwardly take the screen to tell an unspecified number of jokes in an unspecified format for an unspecified amount of money. What could go wrong? We have your ultimate pre-game breakdown before the cluster*ck begins. Steel Toe Morning Show’s feminine host Aaron Imholte can’t stop spinning in a hole of his own design, and the latest round of cope doesn’t disappoint. …

November 3, 2023 – FAT FORK FRIDAY! Josh Denny, Rodney Wayne, DonkeyLips, Chad Zumock & MORE!

November 3, 2023

Oh, no he didn’t! Patrick is making fun of fat people? What is the world coming to? Does he know he’s fat? Should he be talking like that? We check in on long-time friend of the show Josh Denny to see if his nineteenth podcast is the one that is going to catch fire. Micheal Ray Bower hates NLO and talks about Patrick like he burned his belongings. What can we do about this? Rodney Wayne has been spotted tooling around in his Nissan Altima Batmobile, and we want to know if this is normal behavior for a grown man with kids. Chad Zumock practices being pathetic in more ways than one. Come have a Friday, friends! …

November 2, 2023 – Chad Is LAUGHABLY Serious! Tommy Is Back! Haley’s WAKE-UP Routine, A New Guy?NLO LIVE

November 2, 2023

You won’t believe how much show Patrick is going to cram down your stupid face on today’s program. On Thursday’s we try to catch up with as many of the R’s in our world as possible, and yet somehow there is always room for NEW GUYS! Patrick has a new friend who’s got some keto-recipes you may enjoy. Chad and Ray are butting heads about an upcoming roast challenge, and it couldn’t be more of a dream for tard hunters! Haley aka Mrs. Dow Jones has a morning routine that is sure to make you gag. How do her mirrors work? No seriously. No for real. How do her mirrors work? …

BONUS: Kevin Brennan BULLIES Ray Devito! Will He Turn? Chad Zumock is EMPTY Headed!

October 25, 2023

What’s up everyone! This isn’t a show. This is just a stream. Let’s watch some idiots. Let’s see how fast we can make Chad run out of steam and run offline! Will the power go out? How about the internet? Maybe a SWAT or a neighbor knocking? Who knows? MLC is pretty boring but Kevin starts laying in to Ray and it gets soooo good! Will Kevin be successful in turning Ray against Shuli? It’s Melton’s day off and he’s bored and bananas. Come join the fun! …

Members Only Show – October 20, 2023

October 20, 2023

I am not above this, I am far below. Welcome to a Friday night, welcome to a show. My name is Fatty Patty, and I am the king of trolls. I'm coming for your SJ, and only for the LOLz. I am far above this, I take back what I said. We will play with John a little bit, but then we'll leave him dead. HIT THE LIKE BUTTON YOU FAT FREAK!

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