NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Steel Toe Strike, KB & SJ Versus Shuli, Ray Gets Puffy (June 28, 2023)

Patrick is back from the beach and ready to catch up with the latest nonsense in the podcasting universe. Ray DeVito thinks he’s a tough guy and stuff. Kevin Brennan is gloating after being the fisherman that was able to wrangle in the whale that is Stuttering John for the MLC podcast. The Shuli Network had a record day live streaming, with the perfect storm of both NLO and Steel Toe being off YouTube due to unrelated reasons. Patrick has been suffering intermittent Internet issues, and Steel Toe Morning Show seems like it’s starting to catch the eye of the YouTube content moderation team for its constant racism and transphobic remarks. Chad is exposed further as a charlatan broadcaster with no following of note, and Patrick thinks he’s caught another big lie by the crudshark!

NLO Shows

NLO (NOT) LIVE: Bowers Micro Peen, Erik Nagel Stinks, April’s Saucy Breast (June 23, 2023)

Happy Friday! Patrick is on vacation at the beach, but he slaved away for you yesterday pre-recording a whole show so that you chat monkeys would get your fix! Patrick has some quick thoughts about Chad and why he needs to knock it off with the constant cope-lies regarding his numbers. What is is! A listener writes in to tell Patrick that all his problems stem from pork! Micheal Ray Bower is changing up his whole auction process and he walks you through how it might probably maybe work one day. There’s an unearthed video where Bower admits to having a micro-penis and proclaiming he doesn’t care about the consequences. April Imholte has opened her social media accounts with confidence an is showing off what’s left of her family whole also displaying more cleavage in preparation for more simpcasting!

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Aaron Imholte Can’t Bang, P.O Box Surprises, Discord Drama! (June 22, 2023)

Happy Thursday, you very special children! Patrick is gunned up for today’s show, because he was eating peanut butter for breakfast. We take a trip to the ol’ P.O. Box to see what listeners have sent in. One listener insults Patrick with a package of skin care products, and another seems brimming with treats that will need to be individually unpacked live. KC Armstrong seems to be ignoring Patrick’s attempts at burying the hatchet. We try to find out about the latest discord drama involving Dirty Dalish and our own Ian Hawk, but are sidetracked by an emergency watch session of Steel Toe Morning Show. The midwestern grift clowns are having an on-air fight and are breaking down over their own sex confidence. Mooby keeps trying to shut April up to make up for his own shortcomings in the bedroom. Grab your socks and swim for it, sailors!

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Bower Auction Breakdown, Mooby Snaps & More! (June 21, 2023)

It’s a CLASSIC SUMMER Wednesday and Patrick is here to help you over the hump! And you’ve picked an excellent show to not miss, because this one has some twists and turns you can’t even begin to believe. Ray DeVito has let the Bud Light eat in to his brain if he thinks he knows his labia from his laptop. Michael Ray Bower gives a very long and sad auction update. Patrick gets a job interview at Facebook. Little Lemmi is letting her Steel Toe mod power trip flare up again as Aaron cannot seem to reach 10k subscribers to save his life.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Mooby’s Info Moat, The Blondecast (June 20, 2023)

It’s Tuesday and Patrick has had another horrific night of sleep, but he’s such a show soldier that he’s here for you anyway. We have some big things coming up this week and you’re probably going to want to listen. Las Vegas comedian Casper ThaGhost has a new podcast and he’s been very sneaky about it. Butch Bradley has a friend with a dream. Patrick owes Suli an apology, but he also manages to work in some digs at the same time. Aaron Imholte gets caught up in a big flex while coping with his inability to hit 10K subscribers.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Parasocial Fans, Chad is Plastered Again, ATP Art Assignment (June 16, 2023)

It’s Friday and you should stand up and try to reach some part of your back to pat it for making it through this one. Patrick briefly recaps the latest from everybody’s favorite sauced soothsayer, Chad Zumock. Ski Mark and Lil Mir get in to a fight which prompts Patrick to see a bigger trend. Ask yourself to imagine other rooms and areas in David Skarica aka Addicted to Profits Bahamian homestead and commit them to an everlasting piece of art. And finally, you won’t believe the tweets Patrick seen…

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Bending Steel Toe, Blue Chew Man Goo (June 15, 2023)

Patrick wishes he could move on from stupid Aaron Imholte and his insane Steel Toe Morning Show, but he won’t be satisfied until it’s undeniable that Patrick is the king of morning drive! The delusion is so strong with this couple that it’s bound to boil soon. We watch several clips of Mooby and the Scrimp in full-on denial about his freestyling skills, his continued harassment of Chad Zumock, and the constant gaslighting the couple inflict on their fanbase. We watch an awkward exchange where Aaron once again sexualizes his partner, and calls her a cock whore to save himself from embarrassment of having a low libido. The internet drops out and Patrick has to soldier on and finish the show without the beloved chatters.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Bower Fire Sale, A Fresh Summer Set, Chad Chugs Around Town (June 14, 2023)

Summer is here! I mean here in Las Vegas. Summer Sinclair, the famous actress and comedian. She has a fresh set you need to see. Chad Zumock is chugging around Tampa with a selfie stick and ring light, completely oblivious. He reveals yet another merch mogul has turned their back on him, as well as other lies he totally cucked everyone with. We have some good old-fashioned fun watching a rap battle. Michel Ray Bower is selling off some of his clutter from his toilet. Addicted to Profits may actually be really bad guy. Don’t miss today’s show!

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Addicted to Steel Toe, Is KC Alright? (June 13, 2023)

It’s FRIDAY and Patrick’s new album WE HAVE FUN is available! Help get it to number ne in the iTunes Charts by buying a copy today! Patrick has been to court, hence the unannounced absence yesterday. Patrick will be spilling the beans on exactly who his courtroom nemesis is and what went down during this insane exchange. Chad Zumock has seemingly allowed the alcohol in his brain to take the driver’s seat all the way to his hell gig in the middle of Georgia. Patrick gives his stale take on the Wednesday incident. You won’t want to miss this historical episode of the Nobody Likes Onions program.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Album Release, Court Report (June 9, 2023)

It’s FRIDAY and Patrick’s new album WE HAVE FUN is available! Help get it to number ne in the iTunes Charts by buying a copy today! Patrick has been to court, hence the unannounced absence yesterday. Patrick will be spilling the beans on exactly who his courtroom nemesis is and what went down during this insane exchange. Chad Zumock has seemingly allowed the alcohol in his brain to take the driver’s seat all the way to his hell gig in the middle of Georgia. Patrick gives his stale take on the Wednesday incident. You won’t want to miss this historical episode of the Nobody Likes Onions program.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Chad Zumock is a Lying Creep! (June 7, 2023)

Happy hump day. friends! Chad Zumock is running like a bitch after rallying his fans to choose him or the haters on Monday. We are going to go over Chad’s insane lies and mumble-filled self-soothing and find out what’s really going on. Chad has new merch and wants to sell you a shirt! Chad blames Patrick for his studio not being complete as well as people fleeing his Patreon. As Patrick predicted, no one is coming to help Chad, and he knows it. Misery Loves Company has some superchatters that think they can control Kevin and send Patrick out to pasture as an MLC guest, and Patrick is here to tell you that nobody gives a fuck.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Redbar Ain’t Comin’, Addicted to Pouting (June 6, 2023)

Patrick is fresh off another flawless performance over at Misery Loves Company with Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy. Patrick wins the battle of the superchats with his nemesis Addicted to Profits aka David Skarica. Steel Toe Morning Show’s Aaron Imholte is gleefully back in the piling on to Chad business. Chad Zumock disgusts some fans by trying to make Melton look beta, but what does that even mean? Plus – will daddy Redbar swoop in to save Chad? Not a fucking chance. Patrick tells you why on this episode.

NLO Shows

MELTON in the MORNING! (June 1, 2023)

It’s Thursday, and after a full day of not talking, Patrick has a lot to scream about and you people had better listen. Patrick bans James Banks for hitting the same note on the piano over and over for the entire first hour of the show. Beating jokes to death is Patrick’s job. Speaking of that, please pre-order Patrick’s special – link below. He doesn’t want to look like a loser. Ray is not a mean guy but Patrick doesn’t want anything to do with him. Ray can’t stop being anxious during a show. He is overprotective, ignores other people when they talk, and is notoriously opinionated about stuff he doesn’t full comprehend. And he doxxes his friends! Patrick goes through the PO box to find some cool fan creations as well as a lot of things to wipe with. Patrick issues an apology to a chatter who he may have seemed unfair with on Tuesday, and much more!

Featured Videos

MLC Aftershow – May 29, 2023

Patrick is scheduled to appear on MLC on Monday afternoon, so try to plan your hot dog grilling and lake activities around the depressing internet show schedule, alright? Will Patrick bomb? How jealous are all these other nerds about this hiring? Does Kevin reveal just how much he is paying Patrick for his humor services? Only time will tell. Let's break down the show after the show!


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NLO Shows

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 30, 2023)

Patrick returns to Misery Loves Company with Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy, and boy are his arms tired! Patrick performs to a chatroom of accolades and scorn, but takes it in stride. Patrick also gets a SUPERCHAT from KB after the show! Let’s sing ourselves a Steel Toe song and kick the day off right, and then who knows where this enchanted Tuesday could lead?

NLO Shows

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 26, 2023)

It’s FRIDAY and Patrick has been barraged with questions and interest for the past 24 hours regarding the lawman that came to the door and brought some papers. Spoiler alert – there won’t be any big spoilers today, so you can skip watching and make your pedicure appointment instead. Patrick talks a little about what happened and what to expect going forward. Everything will come out soon enough, and you’ll all be laughing right along with Patrick about the insane nature of a man throwing elephant poo at the wall. Patrick talks a bit more about Chad and the recent MLC drama. Vince the Lawyer has filmed a fifteen minute something with KC Armstrong revisiting his gay tendencies and going over the Howard Stern show where they brought in KC’s trans lover. It’s something. It’s definitely something.

NLO Shows

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 25, 2023)

What a week! Patrick is going to attempt to describe what’s happened in the past 24 hours, and it’s a lot. Chad Zumock appears on Misery Loves Company with Kevin Brennan and Bob Levy, and they have a real reckoning. Before long, Chad falls right back in to his old habits once he finds his happy place. What does this mean for the future of the MLC podcast? Let’s talk about it. Patrick gets deep with the analysis of this appearance by the Z-Man, and at the end of the show there is a very special visitor to the podcastle – an officer of the law! Oh boy!

Featured Videos

MELTON in the MORNING! (May 24, 2023)

Patrick is feeling fresh and pumped for a Wednesday show that is going to cover all the hottest topics he needs to dump from his prep sheet. Patrick doesn't understand why Karl from Who Are These Podcasts can't stop lying about him. We watch Aaron Imholte from Steel Toe Morning Show continue to gloat in the misfortune of others, possibly lie about his coffee grift, and reveal other cringe-worthy behavior. Josh Denny is up to his old tricks again by using a veiled N-word joke on the Anthony Cumia Compound Media show. Patrick gives his latest thoughts on Chad Zumock, Kevin Brennan and the drama surrounding Producer Joe from the Shuli network. Patrick gets frustrated at the chat, as usual, and so much more. The chat becomes generous in the final minutes and milks more time out of the show, and Patrick watches Perry Carravello get trolled hard by the Cart Narcs.


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