NLO Shows

July 23, 2024: The AARON IMHOLTE Distraction Hour Continues! WAH-WAH Summer! Training Tuesday!

We have almost caught up on the lies and spin coming out of trash-town Minnesota as Aaron Imholte seems to think he’s slipped responsibility for the accusations of his domestic abuse. Patrick has noticed a trend and thinks there’s another Steel Toe shakeup coming down the chute, and Aaron is holding on to Matt for dear life. Summer Sinclair may have MS and she’s taking chemo pills about it. We hear some inspirational words about how she’s going to make it despite the fact that we all know she’s never gonna make it. It’s Tuesday and that means we need you in the break room for a mandatory training session. Don’t let this gamer kids push you around.

NLO Shows

June 21, 2024: WAWA SUMMER STARTS NOW! Aaron Imholte’s Dark Corners! DonkeyLips Overshares Again!

The lols don’t stop just because your work week is done! We go back and catch some things Patrick missed regarding Aaron Imholte and his fake overreaction to the follicle test of Nick Rekieta’s child. Isn’t it time we try to learn more about Matt, Mooby’s simple Eeyore-like chum who shows up some nights to pretend he’s still a radio man? Let’s take a walk down memory lane to see when Matt stopped having such Savage Thoughts. Michael Ray Bower, aka Donkeylips of Nickelodeon fame, has been cranking out videos that explain why he isn’t cranking out videos. Let’s see what’s happening with one of America’s most prolific child-stars that nobody wanted to take advantage of.

NLO Shows

April 16, 2024: Looking In On The LADIES! Steel Toe Aaron Imholte Has Learned NOTHING!

There’s definitely some Aaron Imholte and Steel Toe Morning Show news to cover this morning, but we’ve also got to check in with some of our favorite ladies of the Onionverse and see what they’re “creating.” Summer Sinclair has some new old standup to show off, and you won’t believe her latest karaoke banger. Angie Krum filmed a bunch of podcasts six months ago but refuses to put them out for public consumption. Where is this haircutting podcast and why can’t we watch it? Aaron is back to his old ways just hours after proclaiming he is a narcissist and needs to work on himself. The humility didn’t last long, and Mooby is back to his old bragging and cope as he wakes up today to find himself suspended from YouTube yet again!

NLO Shows

March 1, 2024: CHAD ZUMOCK Gets MEALS ON WHEELS! Addicted To Profits (David Skarica) Is BACK!

You couldn’t ask for a more complete breakfast! Patrick has a whole floor that is sticky with weirdos and trash, and today we are going to do our best to sweep them up. Our girl Summer Sinclair seems to have been spotted in the wild, and her real-life self is worse than her acting. Our Bahamian boob David Skarica aka Addicted to Profits is back and wants to be a guy without being a guy. Steel Toe goes through the motions of doing their Rumble Friday show. Chad Zumock is looking ROUGH and he’s started pulling videos down from YouTube so people don’t stare at his gray hair and gut. Kevin Brennan is back on Shuli and Bob Levy again, and you have to wonder why he is so obsessed with how other people are doing.

NLO Shows

December 1, 2023: Extra NUTS For FRIDAY! Heather G Is About To POP! Ray Still Needs Help!

Happy Friday! Patrick is extending November for one more day- at least on paper. What a volatile week it’s been for the whatever this is. Chad Zumock has turned out to be one of the worst actors, liars, and comedians of all time. The LOLs don’t stop when Chad uses his imagination to wow his audience with dumb. Heather Gillispie is finding out about Chicago winter while being pregnant and homeless, and it’s going to go bad. Bower has started his walking tours, and you won’t believe the loophole this time! Josh Denny goes to Florida and doesn’t have time to stop by Publix for a sandwich. Summer Sinclair really wants the part. Why don’t you like her? Ray Devito is moving to his mom’s friends house even those his mom is dead and he’s a fifty-year-old man with absolutely nothing going on in life. Strap in, because the phones don’t work again today!

NLO Shows

October 24, 2023 – Being a LEXUS Guy, Bower is REBOOTING, Have a Slice for Training Tuesday!

Patrick is a Lexus guy now, so you’re going to need to show some appropriate respect when you address him from now on. Who knew cars could do all this stuff! What will they think of next! Summer Sinclair isn’t giving up on Hollywood and has some new audition tapes. Michael Ray Bower has a new agent and a new outlook on life. Will he be accepted by the acting community again, or is this all just another pathetic attempt at feeling better about himself? It’s Tuesday, so pin on your name tag because these salads aren’t going to make themselves.

NLO Shows

October 16, 2023 – BON DIA! Comedy Shaman is LOOSE! Summer Was BORN To Sing! Another Missed Goal!

Happy Monday, fellow nerds! Patrick covered a podcast by the Comedy Shaman aka Put Down The Pork Pete aka Clay Combing Through Career Options and it did not sit well with the man. While Comedy Shaman has been a polarizing member of the community, it’s important to realize that once you try to be a guy, you are opened up to a world of criticism and unsolicited feedback. Summer Sinclair has the same problem with recognizing and calibrating her own level of talent. And Steel Toe? Don’t worry about Steel Toe – they are still missing goals and tell you that they don’t, all while begging you to help them help you help them have a show.

Featured Videos

October 3, 2023 – Fans Are Getting INSANE! Summer Sinclair BOMBS! Melton MELTDOWN!

Come join Patrick and a cast of puppet characters as they act out the entire Wizard of Oz! You’re going to love the way Dorothy sings the hits! Seriously grab a Starburst and sit grandma by the air conditioner because ish is about to get fire af tonight boi! No seriously though, who knows what could happen. Patrick has so much dirt he could build some sort of dirt business or something!

NLO Shows

September 1, 2023 – HEY LADIES! More BREAKDOWNS From Comedy Women!

Men have been hogging all the attention for too long. This is true in comedy as it is in so many other industries. With all the tantrums and fighting going on in the world, it’s easy to overlook all the wonderful women out there with the same issues as men. Women comedians also can’t get work. They also think they are funnier than they are in real life, and they also need some tough doses of reality. Patrick finally goes over the Summer Sinclair podcast with Las Vegas comedian Edwin San Juan.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: POSITIVITY! Ray Merch Art Contest, Summer Sinclair Podcast & More (August 4, 2023)

Patrick wants today to be a fresh start and have some positivity injected in to a week of animosity and mean-spirited remarks. Patrick has a message for Joey C and his wife in the name of positivity and a truce going forward. We’re limiting the Ray content to one hour today in the name of positivity! Join in the fun and help design some new merch that you think Ray will definitely hate. But do it in the name of positivity!

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Tape Torching! PO Box Carnage, Summer Songs (July 14, 2023)

Happy Friday! We’ve got some songs of the Summer to serenade your cerebellum! Could there be a new contender for the NLO convenience store banger of the year? Join the pillaging of the PO Box and find the biggest haul yet. And finally, an unboxing of epic proportions that only happens once in a generation! Micheal Ray Bower’s auctioned video tape of the film The Willies has made its way to Patrick’s posession, and as promised, today is a reckoning. Join us around the Donkeylips-fueled flame as we burn a boy’s dreams just for the allure of the lols!

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Loss of Loyalties, A New Summer Song (July 10, 2023)

Happy Monday! Patrick is back to catch up on the weekend drama from a healthy distance. Summer Sinclair is standing up to bullies, and standing up on stages all over town. She’s allegedly been very confused by another local comedian who’s trolling her with a new summer banger featuring clips of Summer. All this and the latest garbage fires from Steel Toe Morning show, including an update on the billboard project which is now looking very not possible. Grab a hoagie and come hang.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Steel Toe Strike, KB & SJ Versus Shuli, Ray Gets Puffy (June 28, 2023)

Patrick is back from the beach and ready to catch up with the latest nonsense in the podcasting universe. Ray DeVito thinks he’s a tough guy and stuff. Kevin Brennan is gloating after being the fisherman that was able to wrangle in the whale that is Stuttering John for the MLC podcast. The Shuli Network had a record day live streaming, with the perfect storm of both NLO and Steel Toe being off YouTube due to unrelated reasons. Patrick has been suffering intermittent Internet issues, and Steel Toe Morning Show seems like it’s starting to catch the eye of the YouTube content moderation team for its constant racism and transphobic remarks. Chad is exposed further as a charlatan broadcaster with no following of note, and Patrick thinks he’s caught another big lie by the crudshark!

Featured Videos

Members Only Show – June 23, 2023

Thanks for being a member and supporting the show! This one is just for you! Patrick has some thoughts on the recent Lil Mir interview with Chad and wants to give Lil Mir a message about his content. The Dr. Chow collab may be a good idea. Summer Sinclair’s boyfriend has some pretty harsh words for Patrick and the onions. Blondecast gets weirder and weirder. Are they only chopping up one episode a month and putting it out as multiple episodes? Is Casper poor? Does he need shirts? Why does Hailey have to listen to a playlist to psych herself up to do three minutes of comedy? What are these dorks doing?

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Aaron Imholte Can’t Bang, P.O Box Surprises, Discord Drama! (June 22, 2023)

Happy Thursday, you very special children! Patrick is gunned up for today’s show, because he was eating peanut butter for breakfast. We take a trip to the ol’ P.O. Box to see what listeners have sent in. One listener insults Patrick with a package of skin care products, and another seems brimming with treats that will need to be individually unpacked live. KC Armstrong seems to be ignoring Patrick’s attempts at burying the hatchet. We try to find out about the latest discord drama involving Dirty Dalish and our own Ian Hawk, but are sidetracked by an emergency watch session of Steel Toe Morning Show. The midwestern grift clowns are having an on-air fight and are breaking down over their own sex confidence. Mooby keeps trying to shut April up to make up for his own shortcomings in the bedroom. Grab your socks and swim for it, sailors!

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Bower Auction Breakdown, Mooby Snaps & More! (June 21, 2023)

It’s a CLASSIC SUMMER Wednesday and Patrick is here to help you over the hump! And you’ve picked an excellent show to not miss, because this one has some twists and turns you can’t even begin to believe. Ray DeVito has let the Bud Light eat in to his brain if he thinks he knows his labia from his laptop. Michael Ray Bower gives a very long and sad auction update. Patrick gets a job interview at Facebook. Little Lemmi is letting her Steel Toe mod power trip flare up again as Aaron cannot seem to reach 10k subscribers to save his life.

NLO Shows

NLO LIVE: Bower Fire Sale, A Fresh Summer Set, Chad Chugs Around Town (June 14, 2023)

Summer is here! I mean here in Las Vegas. Summer Sinclair, the famous actress and comedian. She has a fresh set you need to see. Chad Zumock is chugging around Tampa with a selfie stick and ring light, completely oblivious. He reveals yet another merch mogul has turned their back on him, as well as other lies he totally cucked everyone with. We have some good old-fashioned fun watching a rap battle. Michel Ray Bower is selling off some of his clutter from his toilet. Addicted to Profits may actually be really bad guy. Don’t miss today’s show!

NLO Shows

Melton in the Morning – April 10, 2023

Good Mooby Monday! Come have some fun with Patrick and a train of thought that is sure to exclusively lead you on an adventure through your own brain! On today’s show we forget to even turn on Mooby and his little friend, and when we finally do, he’s seven minutes in to yelling about Patrick watching even though he wasn’t. We watch for half an hour today and bail as soon as Mooby moves on to making fun of black people with songs and voices. Patrick showcases some of the wretched Las Vegas comedy community, including Lex Las Vegas who recently did a comedy sketch parody about Mr. Onion, whatever that means. We call a strange man who challenged us to do so, and Patrick gets conned out of a $100 payday.